Sunday, October 4, 2015


Humans are disconnected in the most fundamental way. No one really touches each other anymore. There is this space that is socially required between people and if that bubble/line/boundary is broken you are either fresh, rude, inconsiderate or making a pass. We have replaced social networks with actually going out and being social. I'm typing this on a computer instead of calling a slew of my friends and family (some of which I know would rather I didn't.) We're right next to each other, at arms length and our hands are full with phones that barely call a live person anymore.

When I'm with a person, an actual human I really like (let's face it love) I can barely contain how happy I am that my corporeal being is in such close proximity to their corporeal being that I must must must reach out and touch them. Their face, hair, hands, arms, back, butt (yeah I have slapped a few butts) and I also hug. Most of my family and friends have become (somewhat) used to this and they either 1. Enjoy me 2. Run 3. Have been worn down and have no recourse and complain the minute I'm out of earshot. I can deal with all three of those. I'm also sure some reading this are squirming at the idea of my crashing through their "Don't You See I'm Not Having Any Of This You Selfish Handsy Loon" Bubble.

I am selfish. I also have hands that want to hold. I have hands that were held from early on by a Mother that encouraged hugging. Her family is a family of huggers. The benefits hugs have on your health have been proven and as a very famous quote says "We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth. - Virginia Satir"

I think much of our need to hold and be held is not being fulfilled but what little that is received is through sex with partners (some without.) Families that are lucky enough to have young children and babies in their lives get more affection than others because young children aren't as afraid to hold and be held. Other means of holding and touch is fulfilled with our pets. Why should the distance between an adult human touch be either a sanitized (often wimpy and emotionless) handshake or a full on jump in the sack?

Maybe, just maybe, if grown people started to remember that they were humans that needed other humans (wait, is there a song kinda like that) and looked each other in the eye, not embarrassed, not ashamed, but excited for that spark, maybe we could shut down the YouTube comment section forever. Maybe I'll sit alone at the next family party.

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The Bun

The Bun
If you don't like rabbits, you can suck it, shove it and then go soak your head.