And Many More

I always loved how on the calendar it goes Pot Day, My Day, Earth Day.  My being born day is sammiched in between two pretty hippie dippie movements.  Of course I don't hold complete stake on one day, neither does any one movement, thing or person.  I have friends born on Christmas Day and a cousin that dared to be born on my Grandma Hollister's birthday.  My uncle Cliff was born on Earth day.  Aforementioned cousin's husband plus the Queen of England and I share a birthday.  Friends have had loved ones die on their birthday.  My Aunt's Mom was born on 9/11 and on and on it goes.


We moan about aging, wrinkles and not looking twenty anymore.  I do it.  I feel age settling into me.  Birthdays are precious commodities.  Having one is the best gift.

How Tube

I've fallen into a YouTube hole today. Tutorials and How To's galore. One after the other. It does not end. How to braid; waterfalls and dutch and lace and holy crap my arms ache watching them all. Medium length and LOBs vs long with extensions for volume. But I found the best hair tutorial ever. 3 Hairstyles for Dirty Hair. Dorkiest derpiest girl ever. Love her till the end of cyber time.

Spoils

Today has to be double blog day because last night I opted to go out to dinner with Siss and then have a Voice marathon instead of write anything. It's all good. No worries. (For those of you pacing the floor over my DVR habits) I'm caught up, ready for the Live shows. Pretty sure Team XTina has it covered. I won't have to worry about having anything spoiled with major spoilers like I did with Star Wars and Adam Driver on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. I waited far too long to see Star Wars in the theatre (rush of the holidays, broke after holiday, want of a companion, Sundance and on and on) and knowing that it is out to rent soon I figured I could enjoy it at home. Then, as I carelessly chose to watch this interview, all of a sudden Stephen asks Adam how it feels when little kids come up to him and say "You killed blah blah blah." I'm not a total jerkface so I won't say it here. Not that Colbert is a total jerkface. But, assuming EVERYONE has seen the film wasn't the smartest move ever. Neither was my choice to watch an Adam Driver interview before I saw the film. So, my jerkface percentage to the sum total of the Star Wars Spoiler Equation is pretty high.

Speaking of spoiled I encountered a child having a full on rolling on the ground kicking his feet screaming so hard until he was coughing tantrum. Not quite sure if this a true definition of spoiled, but it happened because his brother got the mail and he didn't. I was on my way to the mailbox and I see him. No, I hear him first. He is on his knees and wailing while another boy is trying to comfort him. The comfort boy comes running to me and says "The mail man came." I answer in the affirmative and see that another young boy (presumably the brother) is getting the mail and just as I see him close the mailbox little wailing boy jumps up and sprints over to the brother with the mail and tries to tackle him. Of course all wailing boy ends up with is another wailing session, this time only closer to the mailbox.

Suppose, I could have given him my mail before he ran off. It was a ShopKo add and the coupon flyer that I use for under the bunnies' cages. It wasn't what he wanted but it was something.

Shelved

Today's entry will be brief and potentially rife with spelling and typing errors as I am doped. The reason for said doping will be expounded upon later in the new up and coming blog, hot off the interwebs (fanfare and spirit fingers galore tada) loosestgirlintown.wordpress.com For now I am groggy, surly and punchy. The three least liked dwarfs. Still, here's a moment I enjoyed from earlier today.

As I left my apartment and walked down the steps I saw the face of Diana, a young girl that used to live here but moved away I'd say over two years ago. Some of you might know her as the young girl that sold old books to me with her friends. We chatted for a few seconds and then suddenly a young girl comes over, around six years old and squeals right into my face "WHO ARE YOU? YOU HER TEACHER?" Diana and I start to giggle and I say no, introduce myself and then I go back to talking to Diana about her moving back here. Little girl with plastic Cinderella shoes squeals again "HEY! WHO ARE YOU? HOW OLD ARE YOU? YOU HER TEACHER?" I say "Well, in a couple of weeks I am going to be 45." Diana leans back and goes "Daaannnnng." I manage to not spit laugh all over her face and then say "Again, my name is Heidi and I am not her teacher and you demonstrated very clearly how much you don't listen."

As my Mom and I were driving away Diana was playing tag around the cars and she waved to me. She hollered "See you later Heidi." I still have her books on my bookshelf.

I Am Batman

I'm cleaning up bunny mess, Pickle mess in particular as he has been exceptionally naughty in the "peeing outside the litter box and making extra extra mess with hay" department of his cage the last few nights. He of course sees none of this as a problem and waits for me to fill his hay and stop mucking about with his perfectly arranged home. I put on pants, then shoes, then take the full garbage out to the dumpster. Our Complex has a little park area and it is full of kids and Moms and other neighbors talking and laughing. I joke around with my closest neighbor about actually being outside with everyone (I stay away from my neighbors mostly) and I wave at the sky saying "Hello Sunshine!"

As I turn to go back to Pickle and his return to mess-making, I bump into two little boys. The youngest almost runs smack into me. He is wearing a Batman shirt and a cap, all the while sucking on a bright green sucker and carrying a giant brown stuffed toy bunny. I say "HEY! Nice Rabbit!" He turns his head up, highly skeptical and points his sucker at me "Who you?" "Oh, I'm Heidi. Who are you guys?" His big brother answers for him but I didn't understand it so I repeated what I thought I heard back to the youngest "Did he say Kevin?" Brother. "No,Heaven. His name is Heaven." In a flash I imagine how many times in this kids life that is going to happen and probably has. "Did you say Kevin, Oh Heaven." Blank stare. Shakes hand. More blank stares. I then say "Nice Batman shirt too. I'll see you later Heaven." Heaven looks down at his shirt like he either forgot he was wearing it or had to do a second take because Batman is that cool. They both scamper over to the playground.

It's official. Heaven is real. He lives in my apartment complex and he loves Candy, Batman and Bunnies.

"Words are the Voice of the Heart" Confucius

This is not an April Fool's post however (that's a fancy but) I do feel foolish. I had a goal this year to blog/blop more and I simply have failed at it. I stop myself. I talk myself out of each post saying it either isn't worth the effort, it is redundant, it is tired and played and I am sick of myself and/or no one, not even me wants to hear it. Simply, I don't trust my voice and I need to get it back. I need to remember that I do this to heal and help myself and possibly a few that choose to read along. I could talk so much about Ehlers-Danlos that I could start another blog solely for that purpose. Suppose I could do the same for Bunnies and animal welfare/vegan causes. Maybe one for fart jokes.

Everyone wants approval. No matter how much they profess otherwise, they want it. Resistance will happen and ultimately the strongest resistance is inside yourself. I get tired of disapproving of myself. Yet it happens. I want and need to share these discoveries about the big and the mundane not just for me (and that is how it all starts) so possibly a reader might get an insight as well.

So for the month of April, my Birthday month, I am giving myself the challenge/gift of using my voice. To blog everyday. No matter how silly or deep or happy or sad, it will be me finding out what I have to say.

Thank you Heidi.