Okay, latest dream update: I was walking in the hallway of this apartment building, and I was carrying this homemade holder for my plastic bags from the grocery store. This is a real thing, my Mom made it for me, she has one as well. It is made of two kitchen towels sown together lengthwise with elastic at the bottom so you are able to stuff it full of your plastic bags. In the dream, I was carrying mine around but it had split from being so stuffed, and for some unknown reason I never examined what was inside to make it bulge.
So, here I am walking the hallways of an apartment building that is the apartment building to EVERYONE IN THE WORLD, and they are gathering in the hallways after getting off of work, or school, or doctor's appointments, or take your pick. People stare because I am on a floor that isn't mine and also I am keeping company with my plastic bag organizer that is carrying a mystery.
I keep walking, and carrying my bag, the floors change and get fancier as I get higher in the apartment building. Next Brian Cranston (who is my estranged father) appears with his new family and wants to talk. He has a new young wife with two beautiful daughters and I tell him to go away. He is persistent, but I have an overstuffed homemade plastic bag holder to keep carrying so I tell him to get lost again.
The floors keep getting fancier and with that the light gets dimmer. Next my ex Neil shows up and tries to seduce me. I laugh at him and notice that the tear in my bag is getting bigger. Then I see at the end of the hall is a smaller door, kind of like the Willy Wonka door. A woman with two children sees me and stares at me, irritated that she has to deal with me. "If you have something broken give me your list and I will see to it." she says. I tell her that isn't why I am there. She shrugs her shoulders and leaves. I climb inside and see the biggest kitchen in the world.
I am half crawling and creeping in the ramparts of this magnificent place. I find my way down and see a cook in the center of the kitchen cutting up a tomato. His pants have fallen down so far his buttcrack is showing. He doesn't care and I am enraged. I tell him to pull up his pants. He ignores me. I race over and grab the knife, shove it in his face and order him to pull up his pants. I am disgusted that he is in charge of feeding everyone and he doesn't care that his ass is showing.
He waddles off and I know he has called the "police" so I start tasting bits of the rich and lovely food before they come. There are other workers and they just watch me. My phone rings and it is my Mom. She asks where I am and when I tell her that our call might get interrupted when the authorities come and get me she says sweetly and unworried "Oh, okay."
Then I wake up.
