Thursday, May 29, 2014

Smiling, it's my Favorite?

I think I need to be chaperoned at the grocery store.  Last time I was hit on while picking out bananas, this time all I wanted was some vanilla almond milk yogurt.  The local Harmons is the only store that sells this brand, so it sells out quickly.  So, as I stand in front of the cleared out spot trying to decide if I'll condescend to pick up the inferior strawberry, a worker man pounces on the weak prey.  In an attempt to get a case of this precious yogurt (his suggestion to prevent missing out on future trips) I now know his life story.

He juiced for two months, lost 18 pounds, his son hates vegetables, his daughter lives with him but his son doesn't, he loves kale and smoothies and there is so much more.  I mostly just stood there nodding.  Smiling. 

I knew I had to give him my number for the case of yogurt and all I could think was this is getting ridiculous.  Then he asked if I knew about these special juices and I told him it was okay, I didn't want to take him away from his work but he insisted.  He walked me to the front of the store and showed me each juice. 

I'm not looking people in the eye anymore.  Or smiling.

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Driver's Side

So today started out pretty craptastic.  I'm walking to my car, on my way to pick up my Mom for our trip to Huntsman for my 6 month check-up to make sure all that mean 'ol cancer is still gone, when what do I see but someone had backed into my car and not done a damned thing about it.  I just stood there, starring.  Disbelieving.  Not really disbelieving, because people suck, but stymied nonetheless.

I was stressed to start anyway.  Last time they found "something."  Would there be another thing, and will the thing really be a thing... and so on and so on.  Now I have a stupid frakking hit and run bastard neighbor to fret over.  That said, My Mom deserves many medals.  Many. 

We make it to Huntsman, get in quickly, pants off, on the table exam over, things look good.  We did have to wait an hour for prescriptions that never happened, but we were compensated with piles of snacks.  The drive home was much better, my cheesy 80's Glenn Medeiros full volume altered my mood greatly.  My Mom giggling the whole time as I sang every word.

Back at my parents' house, my Dad helps clean up the bumper and tries to wax out some of the scratches.  But it is scratched down to the primer.  A paint job is necessary and my deductible is $500 since it is a collision.  The amazingly friendly agent from the 800 # even called back to see if it could possibly be vandalism, but it is clearly a car that hit me.  Just vandals driving. 

Here's what's good out of all this: My doctor didn't see any thing to worry about right off and we just have to wait for the test results, no one was in the car and no one was injured, the car is drivable, Glenn Medeiros is available on CD,  My Mom's giggle, snacks, My Dad's amazing stocked garage, friendly insurance agents that laugh when you laugh and console you when you cry after a long long day, and your ex neighbor Misty calling to ask to go lunch on Friday.

I'm driving.

Sunday, May 11, 2014


My brother is moving to Houston at the end of this week.  He just recently became an official Pro in the PGA.  He will be teaching golf at a golf academy.  My brother is following his dream.  I am proud of him.  I admire him.  I love him.

Don't confuse this praise for absence of sadness.  I don't think I really understand how sad I am that he is leaving.  Today, he picked me up and we went to our monthly family party together.  We joked, we laughed, we did our thing.  OUR thing.  I know it was supposed to be Mother's Day, but for me it was Brudda's Day.

Yes, he's a butthead.  But, he's my butthead. 

Thursday, May 1, 2014


I'm cleaning my blinds, getting ready for the installation of my airconditioner later this afternoon, and I start to think back to my blog about the joy of dusting.  Wiping the film off each blind and sweating under the sunlight I think I might want to recant my previous statement.  Then the next song plays.  I always play music when I clean.  It's Toad's "Life is Beautiful."

I'm sticking with my original story.

The Bun

The Bun
If you don't like rabbits, you can suck it, shove it and then go soak your head.