Friday, October 25, 2013

Truth Out

I have been meaning to share this exchange since it happened, but other things have occurred;  all night bunny diarrhea fiascos, doctor visits, next door neighbour crisis (there was another that involved a late night trip to Del Taco and some hugging)  doping up my brother with ativan, Thursday night t.v. and laundry. 

When I got to the Halloween party last week I was closer to on time than 98% percent of the other invited guests (age and I don't know how to party) so this gave me a wonderful view to watch people arrive and check out costumes.  Two young girls showed up without costumes and were standing in the corner, so I made my way over to them.  I jokingly asked what their costume was...

Ashley- "I didn't wear one.  I'm that asshole that shows up without a costume.  Pretty bad huh?"
Me-  "If anyone else asks just tell them that's your costume, 'The Asshole that Showed Up Without a Costume'"

We laughed a really good laugh and for a while the three of us and a quiet girl in a Sexy Bee costume all stood by the stereo and, what do the kids say, oh yeah hung out.  (I am so not cool) Then Jango Fett mosied over.  At first I couldn't tell if he was Jango or Bobba from Vanessa's fun strobe lights and the fog machine, I guessed wrong.  He accepted my apology.  Then OF COURSE, talk of Comic-Con ensued and all that entails.  Somehow he didn't predict a grown woman wearing a Bob Ross costume would be a nerd, so he was genuinely surprised.  He then made a Fraggle Rock reference, but followed up with how I wouldn't understand it seeing as I was too young.

Jango-  "You don't know what I'm talking about, that's about four years out of your time."
Bob Ross-  Totally stunned.  "Uh honey, I'm 42."
Jango-  Silence.  Processing.  Processing.
Bob Ross-  Smiling.
Jango-  "Really.  I.  Never would have guessed."
Bob Ross- "So, how old are YOU?"
Jango-  Sheepishly "Um, 28."
Bob Ross-  Still smiling.
Jango-  "You know, my parents are only 5 years older than you and they LOOK LIKE SHIT!"

He said he thought his parents had given up on life and just didn't care anymore.  The Assholes and Sexy Bee witnessed this entire thing and were flabbergasted.  They wanted to know my secret so I tried to tell my truth without being professorial or preachy. 

The truth of the truth is I feel alive.  I do my best to feel it.  Just maybe, sometimes it shows on my face.  Even while wearing a big 70's wig and a fake beard.

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The Bun

The Bun
If you don't like rabbits, you can suck it, shove it and then go soak your head.